Western Green Mamba (Dendroaspis viridis)

Q: How can’t you measure a snake?

A: In feet.

Q: What do you call a snake who works for the government?

A: A civil serpent.

Q: What do you call a snake that’s very polite?

A: A civil serpent.

Q: Why did the zoo’s breeding program have to replace all their plastic pedestals with wooden ones?

A: Because adders can only multiply with a log table.

Q: Why did the snake see Gone With The Wind in the theater?

A: She really liked the book.

Q: How did the snakes get out of jail?

A: They scaled the wall.

Ha!

Originally posted at stories.starmind.org.

Bighorn Sheep (Ovis canadensis)

Everyone needs a pillow.

Originally posted at stories.starmind.org.

Blue-breasted Kingfisher (Halcyon malimbica)

He’s not just the owner of Beakclub for Birds, he’s also a client.

Originally posted at stories.starmind.org.