Squirrels have all the answers:

How did I get here?

You opened your web browser and viewed this post.

How do I work this?

Try the scroll wheel or arrow keys. There’s usually more to see.

Where is that large automobile?

If it’s not where you left it, call the number on the towing sign.

What is that beautiful house?

About $40,000 in materials and $80,000 in labor that is being sold for $1,500,000 because you can look out the windows and see water.

Where does that highway go to?

Vanishing middle America. Maybe take that large automobile on a leisurely journey instead of battling the airport next time.

Am I right?

Not often.

Am I wrong?

Yes, that is your usual state.

My God! What have I done?

You just spent five minutes laughing at a squirrel that never went to school, yet knows more than you do.

Squirrels are also rather judgmental and condescending.